The Roaming BoomersUnisex Coed Bathroom, Our First Experience
When you travel as much as we do, you are very likely to come across situations that leave you in a most awkward and confused state. This is particularly true when you travel in different cultures.
Little did I know that I would happen across such an experience in our recent 10-day journey to San Diego.
You see, we were staying in San Diego’s “newest ultra-chic” hotel, Sé San Diego, and dining in their fine dining restaurant, Suite and Tender.
Little did we know, until we were given a tour of the hotel the next day, that this fine dining restaurant possessed a unisex coed bathroom.
Now, I am not certain that I even said that right.
Unisex, because both can use it. Right?
And coed, because both can use it at the same time??
Anyway, as we were packing our belongings, on the last morning of our stay, I said to Carol, “let’s go down to that coed bathroom, and shoot a few photographs. It might make for interesting conversation for our on-line magazine.”
So, down to the hotel’s second floor we went, and marched into this foreboding place.
My first impulse, and likely a ridiculous one at that, was to cry out, HELLO!? I was somewhat relieved to hear no response, but I did hear a toilet flush. And then I heard a toilet flush again. Seeing as no one had responded, I figured that one of the toilets must be malfunctioning. It never occurred to me that perhaps someone was actually using the bathroom, and had no inclination to respond back to some dweeb crying hello in the bathroom!
Anyway, we took a few photographs, and noticed how thick the granite bathroom stalls were. I thought to myself, it is good that these walls are thick as my recollection of men in bathroom stalls in a symphony of vulgarity that is best not shared with the opposite sex in a fine restaurant.
Carol and I continued to confab about this bathroom, wondered about the motive behind its construction, and we wondered even more what shock it must bring to some of the patrons. I am certain that my Midwestern Dutch grandmother would die before she would enter this bathroom.
Then it happened. While we were talking. A toilet flushed again, and out walks a young woman while I am standing their with my camera.
Now instantly a number of things flashed through my mind:
- Oh no! She’s going to think I am a pervert standing here with my camera.
- Then my mind flashed, how am I supposed to behave? I realized that all the flushing I was hearing were probably “courtesy flushes” from this young woman. And further, to my dread, I am quiet certain that she must have wondered who the dweeb was that was previously calling out hello. And still further, as we had been milling around in the bathroom for about 10 minutes, she was probably a little uncomfortable coming out to who knows what?
My guess is that she had been listening to our conversations, determined that we were not a threat, and decided to make her exit from the granite stall.
When my eyes made contact with her, I am quite certain that I said to myself, “Just act normal. Pretend that this is an everyday occurrence. Why you are frequently in a bathroom with a strange woman.” What? I thought to myself, no I’m not!”
As she approached the sink to wash her hands, there were words exchanged. You know, small talk kinds of stuff. But, I have absolutely no recollection of what we talked about.
I stood there kind of motionless. I think. I glanced over at my wife, who was far more comfortable with the situation. She was thankfully picking up the conversation, and then the woman dried her hands and walked out of the bathroom.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah”, I said to my wife. “But, if that had been a man coming out of that stall, you would have felt just as awkward.”
We both smiled, and walked out of the bathroom.
As I look back on this experience, I suppose it was no big deal. There was certainly a great deal of thought given to assure privacy. But, I can’t imagine sending my wife off to such a place, in a busy bar, with a bunch of inebriated men hanging around.
What are your thoughts? Have you ever been in a unisex, coed bathroom?
14 Comments on “Unisex Coed Bathroom, Our First Experience”
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I have been in a unisex coed bathroom way back in the 60s while in the Navy,, and they didn't even have stalls,, this was in Taiwan, We had a kid just out of boot camp that had to use one while on liberty, we all knew about them,, he went to the bathroom, a few minutes later he came right back out beet red and headed back to the ship. We found out a gal had gone back there while he was going and proceeded to do her business,, Needless to say,, we all had a big laugh. DAve
I have been in a unisex coed bathroom way back in the 60s while in the Navy,, and they didn't even have stalls,, this was in Taiwan, We had a kid just out of boot camp that had to use one while on liberty, we all knew about them,, he went to the bathroom, a few minutes later he came right back out beet red and headed back to the ship. We found out a gal had gone back there while he was going and proceeded to do her business,, Needless to say,, we all had a big laugh. DAve
WHAT ? ? ? ?
My guess is that she had been listening to our conversations, determined that we were not a treat, and decided to make her exit from the granite stall.
Don,
Thanks for pointing out my typographical error. That missing letter “h”, changing the word to threat from treat, certainly changes perspective in the sentence. LOL!
As a male who’s travelled extensively in Europe it bothers me not one bit. I was addressing a urinal in a gas station while motoring on I-81, about 70 miles north of Roanoke, VA. I was draining away and out of the sit-down stall here comes an attractive young woman, who says “hello.” No trace of foreign accent. There was a modesty panel on either side of the urinal, so she wasn’t about to “see anything” as she moved up to the sink and washed her hands.
I’m older, so it takes me a bit longer there, and she left the restroom a few seconds before I finished. As I resumed driving on I-81 a car passed me, honked, and in the back window was the same young woman waving at me with a huge grin on her face. I don’t know if the ladies’ room was out of service or busy, but it was my 1st such experience in the states. At a castle in France, our bus disgorged probably about 50 tourits at the gate. We all filed into the long, narrow
restroom, since there was none on the bus. On the right was an open row of urinals, and on the left was a row of sit down stalls with doors. We men faced the urinals and the ladies all disappeared one by one into the sit-down stalls and everyone drained his and her businesses. I don’t remember any sinks, but it’s been a long time. My late wife, may God rest her dear soul, always carried a small vial of sanitary hand cleaner, so we were of clean hands. Sometimes a restroom is closed for one reason or another and one uses the opposite sex restroom. Know that in some states it’s illegal to enter a restroom reserved for a member of the opposite sex. So I will drain anywhere I can, and I don’t care one whit if it’s unisex or a scrub tree alongside the road here in controversial Arizona.
Rocky, age 73
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My experience is that when there is a long line in the women’s room, the men’s room becomes coed. I don’t ever see it the other way, thought.
I’m guilty of using the men’s room. I try not to look at the guys, but it is not always possible. To be fair, I used a men’s room with no door on the stall once. There was a guy peeing, and I used the stall anyway.
As a nudist, I’ve been in unisex bathrooms and think there is nothing wrong with the concept. Reduces lines and simplifies finding the “correct” bathroom. I never saw any problems in the unisex bathrooms and even showered with both men and women in a big shower area with nothing weird taking place. With privacy walls you can’t see anything anyway and we all do the same thing in there so why does it matter who you are hearing? And yes, if a pervert wants to try something they can follow you into a woman’s room too. I think the pervert issue is Way over rated.
I was at a Southern Cali theme park one night when several girls decided they were tired of waiting in line for the ladies’. They barged into the quite busy men’s room and did what they needed. Most of the guys could care less (a couple young teens said something) but the girls (young teens) were carrying on and on about it.
were there urinals in the bathroom?
Hi Mike,
There were no urinals in the bathroom. Everything was behind beautiful floor to ceiling marble stalls with a series of sinks in the middle of the room. It was actually quite nice, just different for most.
Just about every bar I have frequented has had women coming into the men’s restroom.
Guys think nothing of it.
I have even stood in lines for tbe men’s restroom next to women.
Quite a few bars in Japan (at least where I was stationed) had common use bathrooms. Men face the urinals and women walk right past on the way to the stalls, most of which (but not all) had doors. No big deal. Remember this is one of several countries where men and women bath (or at least soak) together in the “O’Furos (community hot tubs) and cloth is not allowed in them for sanitary reasons.